Nathaniel Clark – A&E Editor

nuc5002@psu.edu

Photo Credit: Mars

The past few years have been an interesting time for the Mars chocolate company. Well known for its M&Ms, the company has been rife with controversy. You expect this would be due to their use of unsafe and harmful production processes which includes the likes of child labor, but that is not the case. Instead, the chocolate giant has been yelled at and abused by swarms of conservative idealists and figures who believe that the alteration of the M&M’s mascots is a sign of “wokeness.”

This string of events started last year when the Mars company rolled out a new design of the spokescandies. While there was nothing really out of the ordinary, conservatives threw an absolute fuss at the changing of Ms. Green. This new edition had the character wearing some simple sneakers instead of her class go-go boots. With Fox News host Tucker Carlson leading the charge, conservatives began to complain about this very stubble and easily unnoticed change, stating that they were “desexualizing” the M&M spokescandies. Amid these individuals expressing their absolute horniness for a drawn candy mascot, it seemed as if they had missed that Ms. Brown was allowed to keep her heels. With conservatives unable to accept that maybe Ms. Green’s ankles wanted a break, they continued their tirade, spreading the idea that Mars was pushing the “homosexual” agenda onto their customer base.

These exclamations came back in fury when M&Ms announced a new mascot. With a flashy produced introductory video, Mars showed off Purple. Purple is different from her fellow female M&Ms in two major fashions: 1.) she is the first female Peanut M&M character, and 2.) she wears white lace-up Doc Martens style boots. 

For some reason, this announcement must have infuriated conservative audiences as they immediately relaunched their attacks. Suddenly, Purple was being labeled as a transgender spokescandy by conservatives. While I tried to find Purple’s medical records to support this claim, I was unable to come up with any solid evidence. Nonetheless, the conservatives continued to complain, saying that this new fictional commercialized product mascot would taint their children and make them want to transition. Additionally, Tucker Carlson said that Purple, not being the same shape as the other females, pushed for body positivity, labeling her as “obese.” 

I guess all of this was too much for Mars because on January 23 the company announced the retirement of all spokescandies. Posted on their social media accounts was a full public apology for the pain and hatred they had caused the public. Included later in the post was the announcement that actor and former member of American rock band The Rentals Maya Rudolph will replace the spokescandies. Rudolph, who comes from African-American and Ashkenazi Jewish heritage, will debut as the spokesperson in the Super Bowl. 

While it is nice to see Mars and M&Ms make the right choice and terminate the spokescandies, it is sad to see them go. Especially with the introduction of Purple, I was excited to see the new team goof around. Purple is exactly what the transgender community needed: a beacon to tell them where to spend their money. 

Nonetheless, I hope Purple, Ms. Green, and the rest of the attractive M&Ms gang make their return sooner rather than later.